Waiting Games

Today feels like a waiting game. Waiting for the school bus this morning. Waiting for the teenager to get up. Waiting for the 12year old to get home. Waiting for the appointment I have. Waiting for my husband to make up his mind and come home. Waiting, waiting, waiting....

I'm not good at waiting. I'm a run at life head long kinda girl. I prefer to DO SOMETHING over do nothing and wait. This can be good and not so good at the same time.

See, right now, it's important for me to wait and be patient. Even when I'm not good at it. Because a better outcome will come if I'm willing to wait. In God's time, not my own. This is a prayer I repeat, sometimes on a minute by minute basis.

So I will continue to wait. And pray because God knows I can't do this without His strength.

A New Year Of Firsts

School started today. A first day of Middle School for my 12 year old. He was super excited. Me, well, I teared up a little. It means our new year of firsts has begun.

Tomorrow another first will happen. Tomorrow my oldest will start his final year of high school. EEEEK! Where has the time gone? Mama's pretty sure he was only 2 just yesterday.

For me, my firsts started about a month ago when my husband walked out. My first time being responsible for all the things he used to do. My first time surviving a major weather situation without his checking in. My first time learning to live without a helpmate.

None of those are my idea of fun. I've been angry, sad, hurt, forgiving, and finally I'm getting to be closer to acceptance of this situation.

I'm a lucky girl and because of these new firsts, I can truly appreciate just how lucky I am. I live close to both my brother and father who are incredibly resourceful people. They made sure we had every thing we needed during hurricane Irene. They have offered me shoulders to lean on and hugged me when it gets hard. They are my blessings.

I also have a very close friendship with my mother. We talk about everything. We spend lots of time with each other and she helps me with my boys by giving me breaks when I need them. She is also a blessing.

See I told you I'm a lucky girl!

So, bring on the firsts! I might have rough days but I'm still breathing and that is a good thing.

Well Hello!

So I created this blog a long time ago and was too chicken to hit publish on any post I wrote. Guess what? I'm not chicken anymore!

My goal with this blog is to organize my thoughts as I travel this new chapter in my life. And they are a MESS!! My thoughts, that is.

I am a stay at home mom for the past 17 years. I have 2 wonderful sons and a husband I love. Unfortunately, he has chosen to "take a break" from our marriage and family for now. Thus this new chapter in my life.

I love to cook and to share my recipes. I believe in whole food cooking as much as possible, raw milk drinking, buying locally grown foods and meats and loving my family to pieces.

I am a rare creature. I come from an unbroken home, with a LARGE family on both sides of my family tree. I live in the same town I grew up in and LOVE small town life, even the busy bodies, most of whom are my own family!

I am a proud Christian! But I HATE talking religion. I prefer to share about my faith rather than my religious denomination.

My Gram H always said "I don't talk politics!" and then followed it with "BUT...." as she launched into a very political diatribe. I, however really do not talk politics. Ever. I have my opinion and it is as right as anybody else, and I prefer to keep it to myself.

I have gained much wisdom from my Gram C. She is the best. Trust me, she is the REAL DEAL when it comes to Gram's. I love to visit her and soak up her wisdom. It is solid, no-nonsense, useful, common sense wisdom.

I LOVE to be happy. I spent many years being unhappy and sometimes down right miserable! I have discovered my happiness and refuse to go back there! I love to laugh and my boys know how to crack me up! And I love them for it.

I have no sisters but I have the greatest cousins who I think of as sisters, without the sibling rivalry. I am the oldest of us three. We spend lots of time together, especially in the summer. They are teachers and I'm a SAHM so that's an easy thing to do.

Thank you for stopping by and reading my ramblings.

Oh and feel free to comment, as long as it is kind. I reserve the right to delete or block anybody for being mean or hateful to me or others who may visit. This is a place of respect, not hate. It will not be tolerated...EVER! (Using my Mom voice) Do not push it or you will not be welcome here!